start my own comedy
my own community
but make funny sounds
for the train rides
map their languages
into funny ones

examples:
fart pillows
or these YIPP YIPP sounds
YIIIHAAAAH
woof!
meow!
have these very young cute girls act like old grandpas:
when sitting down or getting up yell under pain aaahhhhhh
or when talking to someone act like theyre bad of hearing
or wear fake teeth and have them slip out by accident
walk around with a rollator
or a wheelchair
cmon now i saw a beggar fake being a cripple in london i think it was, he said telepathically to himself oh shit he noticed
i heard his thoughts like 100m away
everyone does it anyway
basically their abuse just turn it up to 11
and then to honor my dad
use his gestures
the asshole hand machine
or the hand biceps waffenschein joke
then walk around with this long grabber like martina had
use their language too
oh dass dich de xyz so plaged
ja aber ich han angst vor dir
the greeting will be to stare at each other until one of them gives up and has to laugh
make fart sounds with hands
basically my abuse turned into absurdity
ah sorry madame (to a man) is this place taken? (but its a secret handshake)
when someone is crying or scared
just say relaaaxxxx chiiiilllll
the crying is fake too of course
basically a walking comedy theater
just publically expose top secret info in the most absurd way possible with proof
like send little children to tell them about alien language, have them yell it out OH AND YESTERDAY AT KINDERGARTEN WE LEARNED ABOUT ALIENS!
make fun OF EVERY GROUP EVER
the page turners by making sounds of a page turning with your mouth ccassssschhhhhhh
then have these subgroups
like
very pretty women faking orgasms
but its actually communication
AHHHHHHHHHH OOOMGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG YEEEEESSSSS
then these pregnant women faking
OH NO IT BROKE QUICK CALL A DOC
then everyone has to stop
a train with a few hundred people
its all fake ofc
then comes
the ambulance
dressed as clowns
dancing
like that weirdo here danced to my
music
dontchu worry
we will take ova now

hahahhahahaahhahahah

they are all so smart
but not one of them has humor

i have to laugh myself at this
seriously if youre so smart
why not add humor?
theyre just too arrogant

do very mundane things as if its very very secret
long stare
whisper
dont tell anyone
and then give him the trash bags
that
will
be
chf 15
and
50 cents
but for u
eye wink
ill make an exception
then spit out some tabacco on someones
food
walking by
and hes like hey wtf man?
ssssssssh (like that woman did to me to tell
me to shut up)
"until next time"
tsch tsch that left top annoying sound with your mouth

oh another one
whistle after girls
but its also part of secret info exchange
HEEEEEEYYYYYY and then a very over the top gesture
i do noooot
like
that!
TS
then walks away

at some point make fun of the biohackers too
by hacking them hacking others just exposing and doxxing them
OH HELLO
I AM OANA
I LIVE HERE
I WEAR THIS AND THAT RIGHT NOW
and then start imitating their real voice and accent
and all their private info
now where are my diabetes pills
ah i have to call my ubs bank today
my number account has been suspended 
why highlight this? dont tell me it actually got suspended? funny one reason some are scared? proof of my skills yes...
yesterday at 3.24 by mr xyz
now where are the results of my bloodwork
ah yes b12 are good
dum de dum
hahahhahaha
WTF MAN STOP THIS
hahahahhahahahaha

start calling others chef and sir too
oh here
COMES
THE FBI HAUPTMANN!

when a mossad agent walks past
yell at your friend
HEY MR MOSSAD!

then walk around with coffee
giving random people the thumbs up
or wear a hat
and tip the hat
knowingly

the thai shop cashier actually did say something crazy once
he said something like
ok thatll be ten million
to a customer
i have no idea who forces these very pretty girls to serve me now or in the past
they all insta rejected me anyway
and it hurt me even more

if you walk as a group of friends
do that laid back jamaican walk the other guy did
everyone
more points for more mismatch
eg young pretty cute girls do it, its funnier
then dress up dogs as clowns
put the leash on you and the dog walks you
have girls grow a beard with minoxidil like oana did
and they always talk in a deep voice on purpose
like the prettiest girls act like the biggest bums
and the biggest criminal badass looking guys act like the kindest ever
oh do you want to sit here?
no no its fine
its better for my health if i stand
extra points for gay accent when he doesnt look gay
like these two badass guys death staring everyone then talking all cheerful
then girls
OH ALSO ZU MINE ZITE ISCH DAS NO ANDERSCH GSI
wha? ur 18 man

or if you hand someone something
do it like a laola wave
or a pantomyme
or a robot
here tzzzzzzz u goooooo

show the arschspalte
basically like them with hands in pocket
